Jag skrev en grej nyss. Den är på engelska. Den är viktig. Den är också jobbig, för mig personligen. Tror inte jag hade kunnat skriva detta för ca ett år sedan. Inte på nätet i alla fall. Jag har inte förstått förrän på senare tid att ja, jag hade en ätstörning. Jag var sjuk. Men here we go.
Every day millions of women blame themselves for their bodies, all for naught. The body should be, at best, able to do the things your mind want to do, take you where you want to go, help you, support you and make you feel good. We are all (especially women) raised into this thinking that we’re never good enough, an extraordinary waste of energy are wasted of us hating the way we look, or feeling shame over aspekts of our bodies that are actually in our genes.
A former victim of (and still struggling with the aftermaths of) #ortorexia (obsession of a healthy lifestyle to the degree that it’s no longer at all healthy, to both mind and body, I was hating myself intensely if I did not run at LEAST 40 km a week, sometimes working out 3 times/day whilst eating less and ”healthier”, skipping social gatherings in favour of working out, weighing in on 48 kg and STILL hating my body, labelling me a lazy worthless piece of trash etc.) I am both grateful that I’m a little bit better and still these trolls are in my head.
I’m glad to say my project 365 Masquerades has taught me a lot about daring myself to leave my comfort zone.
For example: I always thought my boobs were too small and oddly shaped etc. (Please everyone, no comments on my boobs now, it’s just an example and I don’t need it). But in 365 Masquerades my boobs are perfect. They can suddenly look big, or they can disappear as well, very handy!
I’m a feminist. I’m a hardcore fucking feminist. In the theory of my mind, no judgement of anyone’s body exists. But the reality is harder to deal with. No surprise really – We are constantly force-fed ridicoulus air brushes commercials with unreal women who look like plastic Barbie dolls, and we are brainwashed into believing THIS IS THE WAY YOU MUST LOOK OR YOUR’E WORTHLESS.
I’m sick of it all. Let’s stop caring. Right now. Ok?